Going back to Guyuan to visit the kiddies! I can't wait! SOOOOOO excited to see them!
Oh yeah, we'll also see Allister too. :)
So Thursday after my classes we are going to head out and then I get to see my kids! I'm so excited! Hopefully everything will go okay - we'll be getting in around 4:30 in the afternoon and need to try to catch the last bus out to Guyuan. If things all go okay, we should be getting in sometime around 9 or 10 at night.
Can't wait! Can't wait! Can't wait!
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
All Atwitter
Arriving and getting to Guyuan went without a hitch, thanks to an old woman at the bus station in Yinchuan. We arrived at the airport and got to the bus station with plenty of time to spare. We went to the ticket counter to get the next bus out and they said that there were no more tickets until tomorrow morning.
While we were discussing what to do an older woman started to listen in on our conversation and mentioned that we try the train. She motioned for us to follow her and she zipped around to another counter and checked on train tickets for us only to find that those were also sold out. Then, she whisked us out to the bus lot and wove in and out of the parked and moving buses trying to find us one going to Guyuan. One time she pushed us onto a bus headed for the wrong place, but we were eventually able to find a bus thanks to her. So, the next 5 hours we spent in the back of a bus speeding down the interstate to our former China home.
One of the things that still amazes me is some of the places people get off at. It will be pitch black out and not a light or anything for miles around, but people will recognize this patch of dirt as the one they need to get dropped off. So the bus just pulls over and they hop out alongside the road in the middle of nowhere.
Anyhow, we rolled into town at around 10 pm. Right around the time some of the senior students were getting out of their night tests. As we walked to our hotel we saw some familiar faces - one of my students looked at me in that, "...where do I know you from...OH MY GOD!" kind of way. They didn't really know that we were coming. Even the drink guy remembered us - he was our first stop on the way to the hotel.
I was so excited I just could not sleep! I woke up at 1, 3, 5, 6 and then just got up to get ready for school.
Nobody know when I would be coming, and the students didn't know that I would be coming at all, so I went up to see the teachers first as the first period of class had already begun. When I got to the office they all screamed and clapped and ran over to greet me. We had fun catching up, talking about what we had been doing over the past year. They have been keeping up with all my adventures through Ms. Cui.
After the first period of class was over I ran out into the hall to see some of the kids. They were soooo excited once they realized that it was me. They would all scream and clap when I walked into their classroom! I was spotted in one of the halls and was rushed by about 300 students all trying to get hugs. It was great!
For a couple of the classes (before word spread that I was in town), I walked in instead of their regular English teacher. They were so shocked when they saw me and then when I greeted them like I used to in class they all stood up, "ooooo-ed", started clapping and some cried. It was fun!
Some of my students were in the middle of their testing period, so I couldn't get to them right away. But when they had their first break I ran downstairs and stuck my head into their classroom - the facial reaction was priceless! It went from "why is that face familiar" to tackling me to the floor with affection in about 5 seconds.
I got to see all of my little (but not so little any more) friends. It is amazing how different some of the looked. They all grew up and grew out their hair. So I spent my time running into the hallways during the breaks in between classes, dodging Mr. Horse in the hallways and chatting with the teachers when the kids were back in class.
It was fun! But of course, this is Guyuan, so I was invited to a dinner. I said that I couldn't make a dinner, so then it was a lunch. Ugh. With the administration. Double ugh. Luckily, it wound up just being with the Junior School admin, so it was a little more relaxed. Also because it was Guyuan, I wasn't really asked if I was available for lunch, they told me that I had a lunch with the admin at noon. That was fine and all, and told them so, but I would just be a little late because I already had made a date with my posse. Yup, my little boy posse. We were going to walk home together one last time.
The teachers didn't understand that this was important to me and to them. I told them I could go to lunch, but I would be late because I wanted to walk home with the kids. They told me that they would understand that I had other things that I had to do. So, I told them that I WANTED to walk home with them because it is important to me - it was a special tradition we had. I mean, I would walk to school when I didn't even have class, just to walk right back home with my posse, sometimes twice a day! So they told me they would send a teacher down to tell them that I had an important lunch to go to and I wouldn't be able to meet them. I struggled to get them to understand what I wanted. Finally, I just told them that I would meet them at the restaurant at 12:30 and I would pick up Matt and Allister. Then the bell rang and I left and hurried a reluctant "okay" from them.
I went to classroom 6 like so many other times and was greeted with lots of hugs as we started on our last walk. Eventually more of my students joined in and by the time we were at the corner the ranks of the posse had grown to over 50 kids! It was fun, Sam danced like usual (but limped a little as he had hurt his leg) and then announced, "this is for teacher" before pulling down Larry's pants, giggling and running off. Sniff, sniff, just like the good ol' days. I got to eat a lot of ice cream and other roadside snacks (I was already full by the time I got to the restaurant) as treats were shoved in my face - "Teacher eat this! Teacher eat this! This is definitely one of the activities I will always remember and will always be time well spent to me.
Lunch was pretty painless. The Junior School functions were usually a little more laid back than that of the Senior School. Only really one round of dice and not a lot of drinking as it was a lunch. So, we were able to get out of there in a decent amount of time and I was able to get back to school.
I spent the rest of the day just chatting and catching up, giving and getting hugs. It was a great day! The only thing that I just couldn't figure out was why in the world was one of the teachers trying to hold me back from seeing the kids by insisting that I look at all of the pictures she had taken on the computer right then when the students were on their breaks. This same teacher also wanted me to just spend time with her classes - classes that I barely saw over the course of the year I was there. I would try to get away and excuse myself gracefully when she would force me into a strage sort of uncomfortable guilt situation. I mean, I was happy to see her students, but I had limited time and I really wanted to see the classes that I was the closest to. The teachers this time around were really heaping on the guilt. They wanted me to teach their classes, both with my former students and students that I didn't know. They also wanted me to tutor someone's daughter and teach at a primary school. So between the guilt and them calling me fat, I decided to stay with the guilt free love of the students.
ANYHOW...
Over the seventh period I went down to one of my favorite two classes and talked and played with them as they had to stay indoors because of the testing. But my chatting time was cut short by the demand to take some pictures - "we all have been waiting for you upstairs to take pictures". Ugh. I said that I would be up in a moment. I said my goodbyes, and finished up my plans for the next day. They also invited me to watch their soccer game during their PE class. Pictures shouldn't take too long, so done and done.
WRONG!!! They hurried me up into the office only to wait for about 20 minutes before they started with the pictures. They took over 50. All basically the same. All I could think about was joing my kids on the soccer field. And I missed it. The price of the last 10 pictures of the same pose was that I couldn't kick it with my kids on the field one last time. I hope it was worth it to them because it certainly wasn't to me.
After the last bell rang I booked it over to the senior school, hoping that I would be able to meet up with some of my students as they got out from their tests. I hear a "Moll-yyyyyyyy" and saw several of my students run up to me. It was so good to see them! We were able to talk and arrange a time the next day, after their tests, to see each other again.
We wrapped up the night with a nice dinner at Mom and Pop's who remembered our usual and laughed as we rattled it off.
I was exhausted when I got back to the room.
It was a good day.
While we were discussing what to do an older woman started to listen in on our conversation and mentioned that we try the train. She motioned for us to follow her and she zipped around to another counter and checked on train tickets for us only to find that those were also sold out. Then, she whisked us out to the bus lot and wove in and out of the parked and moving buses trying to find us one going to Guyuan. One time she pushed us onto a bus headed for the wrong place, but we were eventually able to find a bus thanks to her. So, the next 5 hours we spent in the back of a bus speeding down the interstate to our former China home.
One of the things that still amazes me is some of the places people get off at. It will be pitch black out and not a light or anything for miles around, but people will recognize this patch of dirt as the one they need to get dropped off. So the bus just pulls over and they hop out alongside the road in the middle of nowhere.
Anyhow, we rolled into town at around 10 pm. Right around the time some of the senior students were getting out of their night tests. As we walked to our hotel we saw some familiar faces - one of my students looked at me in that, "...where do I know you from...OH MY GOD!" kind of way. They didn't really know that we were coming. Even the drink guy remembered us - he was our first stop on the way to the hotel.
I was so excited I just could not sleep! I woke up at 1, 3, 5, 6 and then just got up to get ready for school.
Nobody know when I would be coming, and the students didn't know that I would be coming at all, so I went up to see the teachers first as the first period of class had already begun. When I got to the office they all screamed and clapped and ran over to greet me. We had fun catching up, talking about what we had been doing over the past year. They have been keeping up with all my adventures through Ms. Cui.
After the first period of class was over I ran out into the hall to see some of the kids. They were soooo excited once they realized that it was me. They would all scream and clap when I walked into their classroom! I was spotted in one of the halls and was rushed by about 300 students all trying to get hugs. It was great!
For a couple of the classes (before word spread that I was in town), I walked in instead of their regular English teacher. They were so shocked when they saw me and then when I greeted them like I used to in class they all stood up, "ooooo-ed", started clapping and some cried. It was fun!
Some of my students were in the middle of their testing period, so I couldn't get to them right away. But when they had their first break I ran downstairs and stuck my head into their classroom - the facial reaction was priceless! It went from "why is that face familiar" to tackling me to the floor with affection in about 5 seconds.
I got to see all of my little (but not so little any more) friends. It is amazing how different some of the looked. They all grew up and grew out their hair. So I spent my time running into the hallways during the breaks in between classes, dodging Mr. Horse in the hallways and chatting with the teachers when the kids were back in class.
It was fun! But of course, this is Guyuan, so I was invited to a dinner. I said that I couldn't make a dinner, so then it was a lunch. Ugh. With the administration. Double ugh. Luckily, it wound up just being with the Junior School admin, so it was a little more relaxed. Also because it was Guyuan, I wasn't really asked if I was available for lunch, they told me that I had a lunch with the admin at noon. That was fine and all, and told them so, but I would just be a little late because I already had made a date with my posse. Yup, my little boy posse. We were going to walk home together one last time.
The teachers didn't understand that this was important to me and to them. I told them I could go to lunch, but I would be late because I wanted to walk home with the kids. They told me that they would understand that I had other things that I had to do. So, I told them that I WANTED to walk home with them because it is important to me - it was a special tradition we had. I mean, I would walk to school when I didn't even have class, just to walk right back home with my posse, sometimes twice a day! So they told me they would send a teacher down to tell them that I had an important lunch to go to and I wouldn't be able to meet them. I struggled to get them to understand what I wanted. Finally, I just told them that I would meet them at the restaurant at 12:30 and I would pick up Matt and Allister. Then the bell rang and I left and hurried a reluctant "okay" from them.
I went to classroom 6 like so many other times and was greeted with lots of hugs as we started on our last walk. Eventually more of my students joined in and by the time we were at the corner the ranks of the posse had grown to over 50 kids! It was fun, Sam danced like usual (but limped a little as he had hurt his leg) and then announced, "this is for teacher" before pulling down Larry's pants, giggling and running off. Sniff, sniff, just like the good ol' days. I got to eat a lot of ice cream and other roadside snacks (I was already full by the time I got to the restaurant) as treats were shoved in my face - "Teacher eat this! Teacher eat this! This is definitely one of the activities I will always remember and will always be time well spent to me.
Lunch was pretty painless. The Junior School functions were usually a little more laid back than that of the Senior School. Only really one round of dice and not a lot of drinking as it was a lunch. So, we were able to get out of there in a decent amount of time and I was able to get back to school.
I spent the rest of the day just chatting and catching up, giving and getting hugs. It was a great day! The only thing that I just couldn't figure out was why in the world was one of the teachers trying to hold me back from seeing the kids by insisting that I look at all of the pictures she had taken on the computer right then when the students were on their breaks. This same teacher also wanted me to just spend time with her classes - classes that I barely saw over the course of the year I was there. I would try to get away and excuse myself gracefully when she would force me into a strage sort of uncomfortable guilt situation. I mean, I was happy to see her students, but I had limited time and I really wanted to see the classes that I was the closest to. The teachers this time around were really heaping on the guilt. They wanted me to teach their classes, both with my former students and students that I didn't know. They also wanted me to tutor someone's daughter and teach at a primary school. So between the guilt and them calling me fat, I decided to stay with the guilt free love of the students.
ANYHOW...
Over the seventh period I went down to one of my favorite two classes and talked and played with them as they had to stay indoors because of the testing. But my chatting time was cut short by the demand to take some pictures - "we all have been waiting for you upstairs to take pictures". Ugh. I said that I would be up in a moment. I said my goodbyes, and finished up my plans for the next day. They also invited me to watch their soccer game during their PE class. Pictures shouldn't take too long, so done and done.
WRONG!!! They hurried me up into the office only to wait for about 20 minutes before they started with the pictures. They took over 50. All basically the same. All I could think about was joing my kids on the soccer field. And I missed it. The price of the last 10 pictures of the same pose was that I couldn't kick it with my kids on the field one last time. I hope it was worth it to them because it certainly wasn't to me.
After the last bell rang I booked it over to the senior school, hoping that I would be able to meet up with some of my students as they got out from their tests. I hear a "Moll-yyyyyyyy" and saw several of my students run up to me. It was so good to see them! We were able to talk and arrange a time the next day, after their tests, to see each other again.
We wrapped up the night with a nice dinner at Mom and Pop's who remembered our usual and laughed as we rattled it off.
I was exhausted when I got back to the room.
It was a good day.
Kisses in the wind
Saturday was much of the same. So, fun. Lots of kid fun. It was only a half day of school, I was able to set up some more times with the students who were testing and talk to some of the other classes I wasn't able to see as much the day before.
I set up a lunch with some of my kids, which I will talk about in a separate post.
I had to leave my lunch a little earlier than I would have liked because I was supposed to have a walk with Matt, Allister and the admin from the senior school. It was just a ploy for a dinner and I could smell it. So, I got to the school a little late (after a really painful goodbye) and made it to the office, in the rain just in time for the start of the banquet talk and verbal dance. Finally it ended with an early dinner so we wouldn't miss our students, I said that I would try to make it if I could but I had so many student meetings set up that I couldn't promise that I would make it, and to honest, I had no intention of trying to.
I was able to see my former Junior 3 students, now Senior students. They were a little different, attitude wise, but that mid-teen 'tude quickly melted away and we were back to the joking banter like before.
I was also able to see my former junior 2 students when they had a break between their test and class. They were as sweet as ever. As soon as the test let out they poured into the hallways and wrapped a silk scarf around my neck. I got to see my soccer player and the student who gave me his necklace from last year. It was so good to see all of them, they are such a good spirited group, I feel so lucky that I was able to get to know them in the year that I was there. Our time together this time was just too short. But at least I was able to have one last moment with them as well.
Last was my senior classes. I had made an arrangement with their class monitor to have everyone who wanted to see me wait after their test and I would pop in and see them. I walked in the room to see almost ALL of my students. I was so happy to see them! We were able to blow the rest of my poloroid film and just had a good time together. They hadn't really been able to practice their spoken English, so they had lost some of their speaking ability, but that didn't stop them from trying to tell me all about what has been happening in their lives in the past year. We spent over an hour catching up and laughing with and at each other. It was great!
Near the end we all decided to walk home together. As we split off, we said our goodbyes, some of them tearful all of them sad. When I got to Hong Bao (our hotel) I said goodbye to the last of the group, one of the most difficult goodbyes was with the student who sang me a special song on our last day together last year. He just threw his arms around me and planted a kiss on my cheek and said...well, that's all I wish to share. I couldn't hold back anymore. I cried. They were all holding it back, but I could see the emotion bubbling up in their eyes as well. I crossed the street as they all waved and we exchanged kisses in the wind.
I set up a lunch with some of my kids, which I will talk about in a separate post.
I had to leave my lunch a little earlier than I would have liked because I was supposed to have a walk with Matt, Allister and the admin from the senior school. It was just a ploy for a dinner and I could smell it. So, I got to the school a little late (after a really painful goodbye) and made it to the office, in the rain just in time for the start of the banquet talk and verbal dance. Finally it ended with an early dinner so we wouldn't miss our students, I said that I would try to make it if I could but I had so many student meetings set up that I couldn't promise that I would make it, and to honest, I had no intention of trying to.
I was able to see my former Junior 3 students, now Senior students. They were a little different, attitude wise, but that mid-teen 'tude quickly melted away and we were back to the joking banter like before.
I was also able to see my former junior 2 students when they had a break between their test and class. They were as sweet as ever. As soon as the test let out they poured into the hallways and wrapped a silk scarf around my neck. I got to see my soccer player and the student who gave me his necklace from last year. It was so good to see all of them, they are such a good spirited group, I feel so lucky that I was able to get to know them in the year that I was there. Our time together this time was just too short. But at least I was able to have one last moment with them as well.
Last was my senior classes. I had made an arrangement with their class monitor to have everyone who wanted to see me wait after their test and I would pop in and see them. I walked in the room to see almost ALL of my students. I was so happy to see them! We were able to blow the rest of my poloroid film and just had a good time together. They hadn't really been able to practice their spoken English, so they had lost some of their speaking ability, but that didn't stop them from trying to tell me all about what has been happening in their lives in the past year. We spent over an hour catching up and laughing with and at each other. It was great!
Near the end we all decided to walk home together. As we split off, we said our goodbyes, some of them tearful all of them sad. When I got to Hong Bao (our hotel) I said goodbye to the last of the group, one of the most difficult goodbyes was with the student who sang me a special song on our last day together last year. He just threw his arms around me and planted a kiss on my cheek and said...well, that's all I wish to share. I couldn't hold back anymore. I cried. They were all holding it back, but I could see the emotion bubbling up in their eyes as well. I crossed the street as they all waved and we exchanged kisses in the wind.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Goodbye.
Later on Saturday night we (Matt, Allister and I) got a nice visit from two of my students. We had a great time talking with them! I was really impressed with Wang Hao's English - he was able to keep up a native pace and joke around with us. He is such a funny guy. I am so lucky to have him as a student and even luckier still to have gotten to know him.
It was getting late when my students left, so we decided to pack it in for the night as we were going to have a busy morning the next day. At 8 AM we met one of my students who had something arranged for us to see. Um...let's just say it didn't quite work out and she was really quite upset about it afterward. Really, really upset.
It was still raining and the ice cream place was closed when we got there. So as my students started to arrive we all huddled and talked together under some nearby tents. One of my students had told us that it was his birthday on Tuesday and he really wanted to celebrate it with us so he brought a cake. My kids brought me little embroidered tokens to remember them by. But what they don't know is that there is nothing that they could give me that is as special as the time and love that they gave me every day for a year and every minute of my visit. I don't think that I could ever forget them.
Eventually the shop opened its shutters and we were able to pile in. Not a huge group but a nice sized group of people that I love. We sang happy birthday and watched the candles blow themselves out all at once (it was really quite strange). He made a wish which he only told me. Then I just loved to see all of my students interacting with each other - from my juniors to my seniors. It was so sweet how the older kids talked and helped out some of the younger ones.
The monitor for one of my Senior classes gave me a special photo album with images of the sites of Ningxia around the borders of the pages. We went through the sites together and had our last history talk. Before, we would get together and just talk for long periods of time about politics and history. Another one of the Guyuan times I just can't forget.
As it was time to leave, we left all of the younger students at the parlor to finish up their ice cream and the Seniors all walked us out to the bus station. I said goodbye, got their last hugs, kisses and tears from my dear children. Then I had to say goodbye to my little Ma Li. I have written about him before. He and his friends came to visit me in the apartment last year. We wound up posing for some silly pictures together. There is one picture of us together which he showed his teacher and exclaimed, "I can't hardly believe how happy my face is!" He showed me the picture that we took on that day and told me that he always keeps it with him. He told me that he looks at it whenever he feels sad or stressed out or just when he wants to remember a really happy day and he instantly feels better. I just didn't want to let him go. I want to take him home with me. Ma Li was trying so hard not to cry, but we both just could not hold on any longer and we said our very tearful "I love yous" and "goodbyes".
We got to the bus station with a little time to spare. My Seniors helped us get onto the correct bus (I'm glad they checked and put us on the correct bus). We all knew our time was just about over but didn't want to admit it. The student who had his birthday, said that he would remember this birthday forever because it was both one of his happiest and saddest birthdays at the same time. We said our watery eyed goodbyes and I got my last Guyuan hugs and kisses. A couple of students ran onto the bus for just one last moment.
As we pulled away from the station, they huddled together, consoled one of the students, waved and blew kisses until I couldn't see them anymore.
Me?
I left a big piece of my heart in Guyuan.
It was getting late when my students left, so we decided to pack it in for the night as we were going to have a busy morning the next day. At 8 AM we met one of my students who had something arranged for us to see. Um...let's just say it didn't quite work out and she was really quite upset about it afterward. Really, really upset.
It was still raining and the ice cream place was closed when we got there. So as my students started to arrive we all huddled and talked together under some nearby tents. One of my students had told us that it was his birthday on Tuesday and he really wanted to celebrate it with us so he brought a cake. My kids brought me little embroidered tokens to remember them by. But what they don't know is that there is nothing that they could give me that is as special as the time and love that they gave me every day for a year and every minute of my visit. I don't think that I could ever forget them.
Eventually the shop opened its shutters and we were able to pile in. Not a huge group but a nice sized group of people that I love. We sang happy birthday and watched the candles blow themselves out all at once (it was really quite strange). He made a wish which he only told me. Then I just loved to see all of my students interacting with each other - from my juniors to my seniors. It was so sweet how the older kids talked and helped out some of the younger ones.
The monitor for one of my Senior classes gave me a special photo album with images of the sites of Ningxia around the borders of the pages. We went through the sites together and had our last history talk. Before, we would get together and just talk for long periods of time about politics and history. Another one of the Guyuan times I just can't forget.
As it was time to leave, we left all of the younger students at the parlor to finish up their ice cream and the Seniors all walked us out to the bus station. I said goodbye, got their last hugs, kisses and tears from my dear children. Then I had to say goodbye to my little Ma Li. I have written about him before. He and his friends came to visit me in the apartment last year. We wound up posing for some silly pictures together. There is one picture of us together which he showed his teacher and exclaimed, "I can't hardly believe how happy my face is!" He showed me the picture that we took on that day and told me that he always keeps it with him. He told me that he looks at it whenever he feels sad or stressed out or just when he wants to remember a really happy day and he instantly feels better. I just didn't want to let him go. I want to take him home with me. Ma Li was trying so hard not to cry, but we both just could not hold on any longer and we said our very tearful "I love yous" and "goodbyes".
We got to the bus station with a little time to spare. My Seniors helped us get onto the correct bus (I'm glad they checked and put us on the correct bus). We all knew our time was just about over but didn't want to admit it. The student who had his birthday, said that he would remember this birthday forever because it was both one of his happiest and saddest birthdays at the same time. We said our watery eyed goodbyes and I got my last Guyuan hugs and kisses. A couple of students ran onto the bus for just one last moment.
As we pulled away from the station, they huddled together, consoled one of the students, waved and blew kisses until I couldn't see them anymore.
Me?
I left a big piece of my heart in Guyuan.
Emotional Hotpot
I'm saving this post for last because it is the most difficult for me to write. I don't think I will be able to get through this without tearing up at least a dozen times, one time because of anger, a couple of times from laughter, some from sadness, and most from love.
On Saturday noon I arranged to have a "no teacher" lunch with my kids. We decided to have hot pot because then I could get some of my favorite potato noodles - they think that it is hilarious that my favorite food here is potato noodles.
The previous day on our walk home together, they started to talk about the possibility of having lunch. As the English teachers walked by, they urged me to hurry up and get to the lunch. After they passed, the boys whispered to me in a low voice that this would be a "no teacher" lunch. So then they asked me if they could call something other than teacher. I told them they could call me what ever they would like as long as it was nice, so it was decided that I would be their "Beautiful Sister of the West". After my new title had been established, we set up our plan for Saturday.
I met them after their class let out. They all wanted to go home and change their clothes and we would meet on the corner in half an hour. In the meantime, Sam asked me if I would go with him to visit his home. I told him I would be happy to see his home and a very proud Sam strutted off with me down the street. I have written about Sam before and he is just a sweet, hyper kid who likes to sing and dance and pull down Larry's pants. He's a little taller now and his voice has dropped, but he is still basically the same sweetly naughty child that I got to know and love.
So, I met Sam's parents and let's just say that by meeting them, it explains a lot. It was absolutely one of the most bizarre and hilarious parent meetings that I have encountered. We walked into the apartment, and they weren't expecting me. Sam told them who I was and then they got really excited, like puppy excited. Sam's dad started to talk to me at about a million words per minute and kept on shaking my hand. Sam was trying to get him to stop and calm down. Eventually he pulled his dad into the bedroom and closed the door. Meanwhile, his mom was heaping food into my hands, which Sam promptly took out and returned it to the kitchen. When he returned his dad was back out talking and Sam pulled him back into the bedroom and closed the door which was just long enough for him mom to put more food in my hands which Sam returned to the kitchen. This cycle happened about 5 times before Sam announced that we had to go and basically fled his apartment, trying to shut the door on his parents. Ah, Sam. Always making me smile.
We met the kids at the corner and set off for the restaurant. We took about the longest route possible to make the walk last just a little longer. They shared some music with me and we just chatted away like we do. It didn't seem like any time had passed since our last lunch. They asked me what I wanted to drink - they were saying liquor in Chinese, and I shocked them all when I knew what they were talking about and answered them in Chinese.
The food came, as did some rain, but something felt a little off with the lunchtime conversations. They started to ask me if I liked their English teacher. So I went fishing to see what was up. The English teachers were a little mad? jealous? that the students were having this lunch with me because they would only get one lunch with me because of the short time. I learned that their English teacher had pulled one of my posse boys to the front of the room and laid into him. She told him that his English was too poor for him to go out to lunch with me and that he was just wasting my time when I could be doing more important things. She told him that he had no business wanting to use up all my time because he can barely speak to me. Way to encourage a kid, right?
After I learned about that maddening news, I told them that it's nice to be able to see the teachers, it's nice to see the city again, but really the only reason why I came back to Guyuan was to see them. That they were the single, most important reason for my visit. The only reason why the teachers get to see me is because of the students. This boy was one of my best students, not because he had the best English, but he tried in my class. He volunteered to speak at every opportunity, had a great sense of humor and was really a positive asset to my class. I had to let him know that there was nothing he could do that would be a waste of my time. I valued him and all of the time we have spent together. And no matter what some one else told him, he was special to me and she can't take that away. Then he just hugged me and said "I love you always".
Nobody can tell my boys that they aren't worth my time.
So lunch went on and I was sitting next to two of my most special students, Alex and Bob - one of the original posse members. Alex was one of my Junior 2 students last year and one of the students I was closest to, but he was having some problems, so he was held back a year. At the lunch I noticed that he had quite a stutter, not just in English but in Chinese as well. I also noticed that he was really dominantly left handed. We talked about how his teachers would hit his left hand so hard that he would have to use his right hand for writing. He's had a really hard time in the Chinese educational system. Matt was his brother's teacher and he was perhaps one of the nicest students at the school. If either of them found themselves in the US we would put them up without hesitation.
Alex never really liked English, but at the end of the year he was trying harder so he could speak to me. I gave him my leather cuff and wrote a little message just for him. His brother told me that he wears it all of the time and it is really important to him. He also told me that Alex thought that I was the only teacher who actually gave him a chance and didn't just brush him off as hopeless. Throughout the lunch Alex spoke with me in English. Rather than have someone translate for him, he would ask his friends how to say something to me in English, practice it and then ask me. I was so proud of him.
We took some pictures.
The first to go was Sam - he had to take a test. As Sam was leaving, he started to get a little emotional, so he quickly said goodbye and ran out the door. I ran after him, caught him and gave him a huge hug while we both shared some tears. He whispered in my ear, "I love you, teacher. I don't want you to go." I just hugged him and told him that I would never forget him and I will love him forever. After a little bit we said goodbye.
It was the first of the "I'll probably never see you again" realizations that hit home.
I came back to the room visibly upset, I just couldn't totally regain my composure. The boys were upset that I was upset. They told me that they were all really, really sad, but they couldn't cry because they had to try to be men. It was then that Bob just couldn't look me in the face any more. He told me that he kept the picture of just us in his room where he could always see it...then he choked up and had to stop. He would try to say something, but then just trail off and have to look out the window to just hang on. Alex and another couldn't let go of my hands. We all knew that the inevitable was coming but just couldn't let it happen yet, just have to hold on for a little longer.
To distract us for a little they decided to take a group picture for me to always have. I glanced at it briefly, but had to put it away before it completely developed because I would definitely lose all composure. I still can't look at it.
So at the end of the lunch we walked down the stairs, we still couldn't let go of each other's hands, they walked me out to a cab and we said our goodbyes. I gave them all hugs, each one more hard to let go of. I got into the cab and rolled down the window - they crowded around and grabbed what they could of me - they were blowing kisses and trying to kiss my hands while telling me that they loved me, will miss me and that they didn't want me to leave. Alex grabbed my hands and there was this indescribable change in his face - realization that he would probably never see me again and intense panic and sorrow. I just lost it. He did to. (I'm losing it right now, just thinking about it). I reached out and kissed him on the cheek and just whispered that I would always have a special place in my heart for him and that I would always care and love him.
The cab pulled away while they were still holding on to me. They didn't let go until they had to. As we got down the street, I turned to look back at them and saw something that just got me completely undone, I couldn't bear to look anymore. I saw all of them standing on the side of the street, staring at their feet completely silent and motionless.
On Saturday noon I arranged to have a "no teacher" lunch with my kids. We decided to have hot pot because then I could get some of my favorite potato noodles - they think that it is hilarious that my favorite food here is potato noodles.
The previous day on our walk home together, they started to talk about the possibility of having lunch. As the English teachers walked by, they urged me to hurry up and get to the lunch. After they passed, the boys whispered to me in a low voice that this would be a "no teacher" lunch. So then they asked me if they could call something other than teacher. I told them they could call me what ever they would like as long as it was nice, so it was decided that I would be their "Beautiful Sister of the West". After my new title had been established, we set up our plan for Saturday.
I met them after their class let out. They all wanted to go home and change their clothes and we would meet on the corner in half an hour. In the meantime, Sam asked me if I would go with him to visit his home. I told him I would be happy to see his home and a very proud Sam strutted off with me down the street. I have written about Sam before and he is just a sweet, hyper kid who likes to sing and dance and pull down Larry's pants. He's a little taller now and his voice has dropped, but he is still basically the same sweetly naughty child that I got to know and love.
So, I met Sam's parents and let's just say that by meeting them, it explains a lot. It was absolutely one of the most bizarre and hilarious parent meetings that I have encountered. We walked into the apartment, and they weren't expecting me. Sam told them who I was and then they got really excited, like puppy excited. Sam's dad started to talk to me at about a million words per minute and kept on shaking my hand. Sam was trying to get him to stop and calm down. Eventually he pulled his dad into the bedroom and closed the door. Meanwhile, his mom was heaping food into my hands, which Sam promptly took out and returned it to the kitchen. When he returned his dad was back out talking and Sam pulled him back into the bedroom and closed the door which was just long enough for him mom to put more food in my hands which Sam returned to the kitchen. This cycle happened about 5 times before Sam announced that we had to go and basically fled his apartment, trying to shut the door on his parents. Ah, Sam. Always making me smile.
We met the kids at the corner and set off for the restaurant. We took about the longest route possible to make the walk last just a little longer. They shared some music with me and we just chatted away like we do. It didn't seem like any time had passed since our last lunch. They asked me what I wanted to drink - they were saying liquor in Chinese, and I shocked them all when I knew what they were talking about and answered them in Chinese.
The food came, as did some rain, but something felt a little off with the lunchtime conversations. They started to ask me if I liked their English teacher. So I went fishing to see what was up. The English teachers were a little mad? jealous? that the students were having this lunch with me because they would only get one lunch with me because of the short time. I learned that their English teacher had pulled one of my posse boys to the front of the room and laid into him. She told him that his English was too poor for him to go out to lunch with me and that he was just wasting my time when I could be doing more important things. She told him that he had no business wanting to use up all my time because he can barely speak to me. Way to encourage a kid, right?
After I learned about that maddening news, I told them that it's nice to be able to see the teachers, it's nice to see the city again, but really the only reason why I came back to Guyuan was to see them. That they were the single, most important reason for my visit. The only reason why the teachers get to see me is because of the students. This boy was one of my best students, not because he had the best English, but he tried in my class. He volunteered to speak at every opportunity, had a great sense of humor and was really a positive asset to my class. I had to let him know that there was nothing he could do that would be a waste of my time. I valued him and all of the time we have spent together. And no matter what some one else told him, he was special to me and she can't take that away. Then he just hugged me and said "I love you always".
Nobody can tell my boys that they aren't worth my time.
So lunch went on and I was sitting next to two of my most special students, Alex and Bob - one of the original posse members. Alex was one of my Junior 2 students last year and one of the students I was closest to, but he was having some problems, so he was held back a year. At the lunch I noticed that he had quite a stutter, not just in English but in Chinese as well. I also noticed that he was really dominantly left handed. We talked about how his teachers would hit his left hand so hard that he would have to use his right hand for writing. He's had a really hard time in the Chinese educational system. Matt was his brother's teacher and he was perhaps one of the nicest students at the school. If either of them found themselves in the US we would put them up without hesitation.
Alex never really liked English, but at the end of the year he was trying harder so he could speak to me. I gave him my leather cuff and wrote a little message just for him. His brother told me that he wears it all of the time and it is really important to him. He also told me that Alex thought that I was the only teacher who actually gave him a chance and didn't just brush him off as hopeless. Throughout the lunch Alex spoke with me in English. Rather than have someone translate for him, he would ask his friends how to say something to me in English, practice it and then ask me. I was so proud of him.
We took some pictures.
The first to go was Sam - he had to take a test. As Sam was leaving, he started to get a little emotional, so he quickly said goodbye and ran out the door. I ran after him, caught him and gave him a huge hug while we both shared some tears. He whispered in my ear, "I love you, teacher. I don't want you to go." I just hugged him and told him that I would never forget him and I will love him forever. After a little bit we said goodbye.
It was the first of the "I'll probably never see you again" realizations that hit home.
I came back to the room visibly upset, I just couldn't totally regain my composure. The boys were upset that I was upset. They told me that they were all really, really sad, but they couldn't cry because they had to try to be men. It was then that Bob just couldn't look me in the face any more. He told me that he kept the picture of just us in his room where he could always see it...then he choked up and had to stop. He would try to say something, but then just trail off and have to look out the window to just hang on. Alex and another couldn't let go of my hands. We all knew that the inevitable was coming but just couldn't let it happen yet, just have to hold on for a little longer.
To distract us for a little they decided to take a group picture for me to always have. I glanced at it briefly, but had to put it away before it completely developed because I would definitely lose all composure. I still can't look at it.
So at the end of the lunch we walked down the stairs, we still couldn't let go of each other's hands, they walked me out to a cab and we said our goodbyes. I gave them all hugs, each one more hard to let go of. I got into the cab and rolled down the window - they crowded around and grabbed what they could of me - they were blowing kisses and trying to kiss my hands while telling me that they loved me, will miss me and that they didn't want me to leave. Alex grabbed my hands and there was this indescribable change in his face - realization that he would probably never see me again and intense panic and sorrow. I just lost it. He did to. (I'm losing it right now, just thinking about it). I reached out and kissed him on the cheek and just whispered that I would always have a special place in my heart for him and that I would always care and love him.
The cab pulled away while they were still holding on to me. They didn't let go until they had to. As we got down the street, I turned to look back at them and saw something that just got me completely undone, I couldn't bear to look anymore. I saw all of them standing on the side of the street, staring at their feet completely silent and motionless.
Saturday, June 09, 2007
Next Generation Facing Fatal Pressures
Unfortunately, USTB is a part of the statistic for this year. A student jumped off of a building a couple of months ago because of a broken heart.
*********************************************
At noon, on May 16, a young woman committed suicide by jumping off the 11th floor of the building. So far, university authorities have not revealed her identity. Local media believe she was a doctorate student from the literature school preparing her graduation thesis. While some doctorate students have shown sympathy, the response of many students has been stony silence. The apparent numbness could be a result of a spate of college student suicides, which have occured this month.
One day before the tragedy at Renmin University, a female postgraduate student of Beijing Normal University leapt to her death because of depression and academic pressure. On May 14, a junior student in Tsinghua University and a sophomore of China Agriculture University took their lives on their campuses, with the suicide reasons still under investigation. More than 10 college students this month have leapt to their deaths. Hu Deng, director of the Psychological Counselling Center of Renmin University of China, admits he is nervous these days because May seems to be a dark month for suicide-seekers on the campus. Between March and May, college students come under the biggest pressure because they must hunt for jobs, wait for the results of the entrance examination to postgraduate or doctorate schools. And they also must prepare their thesis.
Lacking the ability to cope with this adverse situation is a common problem and the examination-oriented education system has largely neglected students mental health, he says. Hu and his colleagues have probed into several suicide cases in recent years. They found that a big proportion of the students had a medical history of psychological problems, such as depression. "Rather than seeking help from us, the students with psychological problems tend to hide it for fear of affecting the future of their studies and employment," he said.
On the Internet, many people expressed deep sorrow about the tragedy. A student named Xiao Wei writes in a blog, "Another doctorate sister has quietly left us. Her dormitory building is next to mine. I do not know whether it was a coincidence but on the same day last year, a doctorate sister from the journalism school chose the same way to finish her life. I had met her in a class one day before her suicide. I feel regret for her." Xiao Wei respects those who committed suicide, and says one would never understand the pains of others. In fact, Xiao Wei had thought of committing suicide, but the love for family pushed the desperate idea away.
Zhao Jie, a first-grade doctorate student from the same literature school, has paid more attention to the death than most of his schoolmates. Like others, Zhao chose to pursue a doctorate degree in the hope of changing his previous career as a college staffer. However, he has learnt that a doctorate degree without much experience would not secure him a promising job. "The gap between high expectations and cruel reality would keep imposing an invisible pressure and anxiety throughout the three-year study," he said.
Economic strain is another factor contributing to anxiety. Besides expenses on food and accommodation, Zhao needs to pay 12,000 yuan ($1,560) of tuition fee each year. Like Zhao, most doctorate students depend on family support, their own savings and income from part-time jobs to pull them through the three years.
Zhao describes the everyday life of a doctorate student as "dry and dull". He has to bury himself in books all day to complete the required number of thesises published in national-level academic journals. Communication between students even in the same class is scarce, he says. Zhang Yanping is deputy director of Beijing Suicide Prevention and Research Center, which is affiliated to Beijing Huilongguan Hospital. Zhang is unsure if the spate of student suicides in May reflects a pattern or is just coincidental. But she notes that one suicide could possibly influence another. She classifies recent suicidal students into two groups. The first group, which represents about 63 percent of suicide cases, has psychological disorders, such as depression. For people with a history of mental illness, she suggests psychological counselling and the necessary drug treatment. The second group feels hopeless and is isolated at the time of suicide because of excessive emotional stress caused by employment expectations, examinations and their looming thesis.
For this group of students, suicide intervention is even more difficult, Zhang said. Zhang's center conducted research among people who attempted suicide. Researchers asked the students about the time intervals between suicidal ideas and action taken. About 37 percent said they acted on their negative thoughts less than five minutes after they occured and 60 percent of the group was less than two hours. "Suicide is one of the most extreme ways for people to solve their problems. In fact, they have many other options and could have talked to people close to them, such as friends, family, and classmates," said Zhang. Staff operating a free hotline service, opened by Zhang's center, reveal the common problems college students encounter. The major issues include depression, academic pressure, romantic rejection, family conflicts, economical difficulties and frustration because of the gap between the job market and high expectations. As a professional psychologist, Zhang has observed in recent years that college authorities have been paying more attention to the mental health of students. Some teachers are obtaining counselling certificates and professional counselling services are also being introduced on university campuses.
Since 2000, Beijing Normal University has initiated the Capital College Students' Psychological Health Festival on May 25 every year. Famous psychologists were invited to give lectures on the subject last Friday in Beijing when universities across the country took part in the festival. However, experts point out the media has conveyed misleading information that the campus suicide rate was significantly high. Zhang estimates the suicide rate among college students is only six people per 100,000, which is much lower than 23 per 100,000 among the whole population and more than 30 per 100,000 among people between the ages of 15 and 34. However, Zhang believes that improving the mental health among students is a life-long project. "The starting point of cultivating mental health is definitely not the college campus, but from early childhood," she said.
*********************************************
At noon, on May 16, a young woman committed suicide by jumping off the 11th floor of the building. So far, university authorities have not revealed her identity. Local media believe she was a doctorate student from the literature school preparing her graduation thesis. While some doctorate students have shown sympathy, the response of many students has been stony silence. The apparent numbness could be a result of a spate of college student suicides, which have occured this month.
One day before the tragedy at Renmin University, a female postgraduate student of Beijing Normal University leapt to her death because of depression and academic pressure. On May 14, a junior student in Tsinghua University and a sophomore of China Agriculture University took their lives on their campuses, with the suicide reasons still under investigation. More than 10 college students this month have leapt to their deaths. Hu Deng, director of the Psychological Counselling Center of Renmin University of China, admits he is nervous these days because May seems to be a dark month for suicide-seekers on the campus. Between March and May, college students come under the biggest pressure because they must hunt for jobs, wait for the results of the entrance examination to postgraduate or doctorate schools. And they also must prepare their thesis.
Lacking the ability to cope with this adverse situation is a common problem and the examination-oriented education system has largely neglected students mental health, he says. Hu and his colleagues have probed into several suicide cases in recent years. They found that a big proportion of the students had a medical history of psychological problems, such as depression. "Rather than seeking help from us, the students with psychological problems tend to hide it for fear of affecting the future of their studies and employment," he said.
On the Internet, many people expressed deep sorrow about the tragedy. A student named Xiao Wei writes in a blog, "Another doctorate sister has quietly left us. Her dormitory building is next to mine. I do not know whether it was a coincidence but on the same day last year, a doctorate sister from the journalism school chose the same way to finish her life. I had met her in a class one day before her suicide. I feel regret for her." Xiao Wei respects those who committed suicide, and says one would never understand the pains of others. In fact, Xiao Wei had thought of committing suicide, but the love for family pushed the desperate idea away.
Zhao Jie, a first-grade doctorate student from the same literature school, has paid more attention to the death than most of his schoolmates. Like others, Zhao chose to pursue a doctorate degree in the hope of changing his previous career as a college staffer. However, he has learnt that a doctorate degree without much experience would not secure him a promising job. "The gap between high expectations and cruel reality would keep imposing an invisible pressure and anxiety throughout the three-year study," he said.
Economic strain is another factor contributing to anxiety. Besides expenses on food and accommodation, Zhao needs to pay 12,000 yuan ($1,560) of tuition fee each year. Like Zhao, most doctorate students depend on family support, their own savings and income from part-time jobs to pull them through the three years.
Zhao describes the everyday life of a doctorate student as "dry and dull". He has to bury himself in books all day to complete the required number of thesises published in national-level academic journals. Communication between students even in the same class is scarce, he says. Zhang Yanping is deputy director of Beijing Suicide Prevention and Research Center, which is affiliated to Beijing Huilongguan Hospital. Zhang is unsure if the spate of student suicides in May reflects a pattern or is just coincidental. But she notes that one suicide could possibly influence another. She classifies recent suicidal students into two groups. The first group, which represents about 63 percent of suicide cases, has psychological disorders, such as depression. For people with a history of mental illness, she suggests psychological counselling and the necessary drug treatment. The second group feels hopeless and is isolated at the time of suicide because of excessive emotional stress caused by employment expectations, examinations and their looming thesis.
For this group of students, suicide intervention is even more difficult, Zhang said. Zhang's center conducted research among people who attempted suicide. Researchers asked the students about the time intervals between suicidal ideas and action taken. About 37 percent said they acted on their negative thoughts less than five minutes after they occured and 60 percent of the group was less than two hours. "Suicide is one of the most extreme ways for people to solve their problems. In fact, they have many other options and could have talked to people close to them, such as friends, family, and classmates," said Zhang. Staff operating a free hotline service, opened by Zhang's center, reveal the common problems college students encounter. The major issues include depression, academic pressure, romantic rejection, family conflicts, economical difficulties and frustration because of the gap between the job market and high expectations. As a professional psychologist, Zhang has observed in recent years that college authorities have been paying more attention to the mental health of students. Some teachers are obtaining counselling certificates and professional counselling services are also being introduced on university campuses.
Since 2000, Beijing Normal University has initiated the Capital College Students' Psychological Health Festival on May 25 every year. Famous psychologists were invited to give lectures on the subject last Friday in Beijing when universities across the country took part in the festival. However, experts point out the media has conveyed misleading information that the campus suicide rate was significantly high. Zhang estimates the suicide rate among college students is only six people per 100,000, which is much lower than 23 per 100,000 among the whole population and more than 30 per 100,000 among people between the ages of 15 and 34. However, Zhang believes that improving the mental health among students is a life-long project. "The starting point of cultivating mental health is definitely not the college campus, but from early childhood," she said.
About Your Pearly Whites...
The strike is still on, but I just thought I would forward this on to all of you!
************
On June 1, 2007, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) issued the following warning regarding toothpaste from China. The warning, which is repeated in its entirety below, can also be found at http://www.fda.gov/bbs/topics/NEWS/2007/NEW01646.html
__,_._,___
************
On June 1, 2007, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) issued the following warning regarding toothpaste from China. The warning, which is repeated in its entirety below, can also be found at http://www.fda.gov/bbs/topics/NEWS/2007/NEW01646.html
FDA Advises Consumers to Avoid Toothpaste From China Containing Harmful Chemical
FDA Detains One Contaminated Shipment, Issues Import Alert
The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) today warned consumers to avoid using tubes of toothpaste labeled as made in China, and issued an import alert to prevent toothpaste containing the poisonous chemical diethylene glycol (DEG) from entering the United States.
DEG is used in antifreeze and as a solvent.
Consumers should examine toothpaste products for labeling that says the product is made in China. Out of an abundance of caution, FDA suggests that consumers throw away toothpaste with that labeling. FDA is concerned that these products may contain "diethylene glycol," also known as "diglycol" or "diglycol stearate."
FDA is not aware of any U.S. reports of poisonings from toothpaste containing DEG. However, the agency is concerned about potential risks from chronic exposure to DEG and exposure to DEG in certain populations, such as children and individuals with kidney or liver disease. DEG in toothpaste has a low but meaningful risk of toxicity and injury to these populations. Toothpaste is not intended to be swallowed, but FDA is concerned about unintentional swallowing or ingestion of toothpaste containing DEG.
FDA has identified the following brands of toothpaste from China that contain DEG and are included in the import alert: Cooldent Fluoride; Cooldent Spearmint; Cooldent ICE; Dr. Cool, Everfresh Toothpaste; Superdent Toothpaste; Clean Rite Toothpaste; Oralmax Extreme; Oral Bright Fresh Spearmint Flavor; Bright Max Peppermint Flavor; ShiR Fresh Mint Fluoride Paste; DentaPro; DentaKleen; and DentaKleen Junior. Manufacturers of these products are: Goldcredit International Enterprises Limited; Goldcredit International Trading Company Limited; and Suzhou City Jinmao Daily Chemicals Company Limited. The products typically are sold at low-cost, "bargain" retail outlets.
Based on reports of contaminated toothpaste from China found in several countries, including Panama, FDA increased its scrutiny and began sampling toothpaste and other dental products manufactured in China that were imported into the United States.
FDA inspectors identified and detained one shipment of toothpaste at the U.S. border, containing about 3 percent DEG by weight. In addition, FDA inspectors found and tested toothpaste products from China located at a distribution center and a retail store. The highest level found was between 3-4 percent by weight. The product at the retail store was not labeled as containing DEG but was found to contain the substance.
DEG poisoning is an important public safety issue. The agency is aware of reports of patient deaths and injuries in other countries over the past several years from ingesting DEG-contaminated pharmaceutical preparations, such as cough syrups and acetaminophen syrup. FDA recently issued a guidance document to urge U.S. pharmaceutical manufacturers to be vigilant in assuring that glycerin, a sweetener commonly used worldwide in liquid over-the-counter and prescription drug products, is not contaminated with DEG.
FDA continues to investigate this problem. If FDA identifies other brands of toothpaste products containing DEG, FDA will take appropriate actions, including adding products and their manufacturers to the import alert to prevent them from entering the United States.
Consumers can report adverse reactions or quality problems experienced with the use of these products to FDA's MedWatch Adverse Event Reporting program: www.fda.gov/medwatch/report.htm
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
